A friend of mine has really been through a personal hell during the past seven years.
He divorced, remarried, had two new babies, his business tanked, his new wife got cancer, he dissipated his life-savings, he went bankrupt, and more.
During the same period he quit drinking, started exercising, lost weight, and down-sized his lavish lifestyle, first out of necessity, and later, out of a newly embraced prudence.
All was not dross, by any means, and comparing his old life to the new, he was much happier, though his finances were still wobbly.
He used to define his worth based on his possessions.
He was his cars, homes, vacations, and balance sheets.
Until it became clear that he was profoundly unhappy.
As depicted in John Steinbeck's novel, "The Pearl," his wealth became his poverty, his success, his failure, his victory, his defeat Now, he's wiser.
He enjoys wearing his jogging pants until they're holey.
His car is 27 model years young.
Yet he feels more centered, spiritually, than he has ever been, even when external events seemed to be going mostly his way.
What has he learned? What lessons can he share, having lived in the abyss for quite some time? (1) Grace is amazing.
Suffering happens to everyone, but being spared even worse pain is a blessing.
(2) Solomon was right when he prayed: Give me neither poverty nor riches.
(3) If we help others with generosity, in our time of need we will be helped.
(4) Expecting miracles is pragmatic.
It keeps hope alive.
(5) This too, shall pass.
Material wealth is something everyone should experience, he says, at least once in his or her life.
It provides perspective, enables one to be generous, to consider philosophy, and to be patient and somewhat free from external demands.
Losing wealth facilitates detachment and a better understanding of what matters in life.
If material success comes to you again, he says, you'll really be able to appreciate it.