Most of us, at some point in our lives, will deal with the darker side of alcohol. If we're very lucky, it will be a fleeting encounter - a boozy few weeks in our student days, a bravado-fuelled 18-30 holiday with friends or an overindulgent Christmas at home. However, sometimes we can find ourselves faced with a very real dilemma. A person close to us developing an alcohol dependency that is obvious to everyone but themselves. In this case, we often feel compelled to help. If you are planning on confronting a friend or loved one about alcohol misuse, there are a few dos and don't's you should keep in mind.
Do get involved:
It is common for people to have reservations about confronting those around them about alcohol abuse. Often they feel that it is none of their business, or feel that confronting them might put a cherished relationship at risk. These feelings are commendable, but know that almost 70% of recovering alcoholics cite the intervention of a friend as the reason behind their recovery.
Don't go in all guns blazing:
It is tempting to adopt a direct, aggressive, confrontational approach when dealing with an alcoholic, with a goal of cutting straight to the issue. Lecturing like this can have the opposite effect, driving a wedge between you and making them resentful and resistant. Instead, avoid shaming or accusatory statements, instead focusing on a compassionate and supportive approach.
Do have a plan:
It will be helpful if do your research. If your friend or loved one is receptive to your intervention, it is important to have the information about alcohol advice and treatment organizations readily available. Offer assistance and support, have contact information and FAQs to hand - show them that they do not have to face their problem alone.
Don't be discouraged:
There is no guarantee that a person suffering with alcoholism will be instantly receptive to a concerned friend. Anger, denial and resistance are very common responses. They may tell you to mind your own business or becoming hurtful and abusive. It is important to remember that you are doing the right thing, and although they may be angry now, you may have laid the foundation for future recovery. Don't be disheartened and do not doubt your intentions. The desire to help marks your empathy and compassion, and is a thing to be proud of, not ashamed.
Do get involved:
It is common for people to have reservations about confronting those around them about alcohol abuse. Often they feel that it is none of their business, or feel that confronting them might put a cherished relationship at risk. These feelings are commendable, but know that almost 70% of recovering alcoholics cite the intervention of a friend as the reason behind their recovery.
Don't go in all guns blazing:
It is tempting to adopt a direct, aggressive, confrontational approach when dealing with an alcoholic, with a goal of cutting straight to the issue. Lecturing like this can have the opposite effect, driving a wedge between you and making them resentful and resistant. Instead, avoid shaming or accusatory statements, instead focusing on a compassionate and supportive approach.
Do have a plan:
It will be helpful if do your research. If your friend or loved one is receptive to your intervention, it is important to have the information about alcohol advice and treatment organizations readily available. Offer assistance and support, have contact information and FAQs to hand - show them that they do not have to face their problem alone.
Don't be discouraged:
There is no guarantee that a person suffering with alcoholism will be instantly receptive to a concerned friend. Anger, denial and resistance are very common responses. They may tell you to mind your own business or becoming hurtful and abusive. It is important to remember that you are doing the right thing, and although they may be angry now, you may have laid the foundation for future recovery. Don't be disheartened and do not doubt your intentions. The desire to help marks your empathy and compassion, and is a thing to be proud of, not ashamed.
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